非主流
发表于 2011-9-19 20:13:58
不出意外的话，kuthlaav同学的写作应该是至少能拿7分的。
豆腐干风格
发表于 2011-9-19 21:41:56
谢谢楼下的建议，我改……
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午夜就放纵
发表于 2011-9-20 02:26:57
我认为你只要临场发挥上控制好速度把该写的写完，不偏题不出重大的逻辑纰漏，至少7分是比较稳的。因为词汇、语法和流畅度上完全没有什么问题。不过建议在自己的帖子中展开进一步讨论，不要hijack楼主的帖子。
98gyhuvzg9
发表于 2011-9-20 03:40:07
recent years, the number of crimes committed by young people in major city,throughout the world is increasing. discuss this issue, give the reasons and suggests some solution.
nowadays, in some major cities,a number of young people commit to crimes.
The reasons for this phenomenon sre complicated.The chief reason is high unemployment rate. In present -day society,a large number of positions are replaced by high technology.Many jobs were finished by many people in the past; but today most jobs could be done by few people operating in front of computers. As a result,a great number of people lose their jobs ,especially,young adults who tend to have less experience. In order to live, they do something against the law. Moreover,young generation tend to be more inpulsive ,compared with past generations. when they suffer the difficulties, they are likely to take extremely ways to solve the problems. The flighting between children is a good case to the point. Finally , some young people have mental illness.When they suffer a series of unlucky matters, they will blame that society is not fair to them.Hence,they will take some revenges on society.
So serious is the problem that we have no alterlatives but take some measures to tackle the issue. Primarily,young adults should be encouraged to take part in job training and governments should create more jobs for young people. Secondly, education about how to control temper should be avaluable to everyone.In that way, they learn how to control their anger, which is very effectively to reduce the violence. Last but not least, free psychology consel service should access to individuals.
From above analysis, a truth can be found that young men commit crimes is attribute tovarious resons. Fortunately, we have some measures to address it.
tjcmm
发表于 2011-9-20 07:39:36
LZ 加油