[雅思写作] 回忆10.12号写作taskii 求评分

u7lhyuul7t

题目和答案都是我回忆出来的,应该大体相近,不会有太大的偏差. 我是第一次考鸭, 得到的分数和我想像的有很大的出入,拜托各位给点评一下,看看这篇文章值几分



Some people think reading is the best way for adults to acquire knowledge after graduation from school. Some people think there are better approaches. Discuss both views and give your own opinion





The debate on what is the best way for adults to acquire new knowledge after graduation from school has never stopped. Some people would suggest reading is unquestionably the best approach, as it only needs a book and a quiet and peaceful reading environment. Some other people may hold different ideas and say there are some other better ways such as watching TV or listening to radio. Both of these views have their own merits, but to myself, I am inclined to take side to the latter one.

It is quite obvious that reading is the most economic and effective way for us to gain knowledge. As mentioned above, just bringing a book and sitting in a caffe or library, we can enjoy our reading time with much pleasure. And don't forget reading the most familiar way to us as well, as it's the main way we used to learn new things  and took examinations when we were students in school. After so many years of reading, we just get used to it and it is more than natural for us to keep reading to acquire new knowledge after graduation.

However, whether reading is the best way of learning new things is a different story. Some people would regard reading as boring and tedious, and  time-consuming as well. We need to spend a wealth of time to finish a book, which we simply can't afford after graduation. As most of us, or all of us will have to find a job after graduation. We need to face up our job responsibilities which in most of time involve a tight time schedule. After some people get married and have their own families, they need to face household chores as well. So in this case, watching TV or listening to radio may be more advisable. As they both require less time and can be more interactive and interesting. Travelling could be another good idea, as we can admire the spectaculars natural scenery and in the meanwhile, talk with people from all walk of life to learn new things.

In conclusion, reading is a good way for us to gain knowledge after graduation. But for some people who are too busy to afford reading, watching TV or listening to radio programs may be a better approach. We should decide our own ways to learn new things based on our own situation.





我觉得这篇文章丝毫的新意也写不出来., 但总体应该是通顺的吧?

左右莫逢源

我觉得6吧，我的作文就是一坨屎！

宝山得宝

写作上5是很容易的
5-》6也不难，6-》7就很难了，也需要运气

lebron85553

看完lz的作文和大家的点评，我觉得我的写作能力大约在2.5——3之间。
唉。。。

訷譕訫

都没过。现在报了1207的A类，重新找外教闭关修炼一个月，不成功便成仁！

夕阳漫漫

格斗士12号哪个没过7？

u7lhyuul7t

顾家北的书已经买了,多谢你的建议!

u7lhyuul7t

多谢指教!!
这样看起来,自己的写作真的不怎么样!

所有帖子仅代表

5.5没给错，主要是TR太弱，反反复复在说车轱辘话，没有进行深入讨论。建议看顾家北的《手把手》，看看正确的论证应该如何做，然后用刘洪波的《最简化》，建立自己的写作模式。

hbow0479

这篇文章应该是5-5.5，我也在准备写作，几点小建议。
1，三大从句至少要用2个；it is 这种 句型至少用2个地方。状语提前至少用一次。句式要多，不要都是subject+verb+object(adj)。
2，不要和题目有重复的句子，是指结构相同，关键词一样，这种句子是会被划掉。比如，第一段   the best way for adults to acquire new knowledge after graduation from school。当然也包括后面的句子不要和前面已有的句子重复。比如，太多的watching tv,可以before screens， in front of tv.太多就显得你的词汇太少了。
3，固定搭配要熟悉。比如 debate about ，controversy over ,hold views, Both of these views(both 只能修饰2种，上下文看应该是其它多种方法），but to myself(比如 in my point of view,in my opinion, from my perspective),I am inclined (I am convinced that), take side to the latter one (没有这种说法的,可以support ......）,太多了，所以读起来就非常拗口
4，用词准确方面差的很远，多读一些网上的文章，评论性和介绍未来科技之类的比如bbc future。  比如would suggest reading is unquestionably the best approach 既然是would意思就是可能性较弱，后面为什么又是unquestionably ，可以用some people believe that；  the most economic and effective way，如果不是很确定，少用most这种绝对修饰，至少用one of the most ....ways，既然都是最有效的，从某种程度就是the best approach ;spend a wealth of time , 一般都是considerable；还有很多如most of us这种口语化的句子和单词，太多了。
5，观点说服力太弱了。我觉得你自己都说服不了自己。仅仅因为没有时间，就决定是不是the best approach，太牵强了。另外Discuss both views and give your own opinion，这种题目都是5段论，突出你已经discuss both views，和你的观点。不然很容易判定为 not fully cover the task。

总的来说，观点没有说服力，句式太简单，用词很差，语法广度和准确度也不好。