鸭子写作苦闷中，求批改

RBA

刚开始复习，看着10天突破。真的对自己的写作水平完全没有底，只好按部就班地跟着书本练习。

今天的议题是：

Some people think students should focus on a few subjects while others think they should study a wide range of subjects. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

偶咬了好几次笔头，赶杀了无数次想查词霸的冲动，终于写下了这篇短文，求批改！如果有大牛能大概评估一下5，6，7分哪个比较靠谱呢？5月26号考试哈，冲刺！



The education method of whether students should study a wide range of subjects or narrow their scope in focused topics has been debated widely recently in our society, and either camp can convince the other with firm evidence. Actually, it reflect the fact that either way can override the other with unique benefits. Both teaching methodologies are widely conducted in the existing education system for a long time, therefore there are numerous evidences that can prove the reasonability of the coexistence of the two different ways.  

Firstly, the study scope of students majoring in different subjects would differ. Majors as music, art, philosophy would require the students being able to express more comprehensive feelings which would be a combination of a broad range of knowledge, while students studying in engineering, medical would be asked to build the profound knowledge of dedicated topics so that they would perform more accurately in their future work.  Secondly, students with different learning targets shall be treated with different teaching methods. Students who are seeking of higher education in the future such as a postgraduate after the college study would be willing to research on a wide range of related subjects in their current schedule, in contrast, those who expect more smooth operation in their focused job skills would prefer to spend time on practicing the limited amount of tasks.

It might be argued that the broader range of knowledge would always be good for the life-time growth of a person, it has be considered together with students’ personal willing and their short-term target, however. Moreover, the more focused study in their college time does not prevent their self-learning in a wider range in the later stage of their life if it is needed in their job or other life skills, and it is obvious that the knowledge learned in the school time can never be sufficient for the needs in their later work or lives no matter how widely the teacher had taught.

In summary, the current education system with two teaching methodologies fit into the variable requirements from students and the society, thus both of them shall be promoted and conducted separately in the teaching practice to targeted groups of students.

tkff9713

真心好难啊，不过至少6分吧。太多看不懂了，水平有限，楼下跟进，《10天》讲的都这样的模式啊？太复杂了吧，个人以为容易出错哦