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[雅思杂谈] 作文 求批 (第二篇)!

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楼主
发表于 2010-5-12 11:47:02 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式 来自: INNA

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Topic:

In some societies, more and more people choose to live on their own. What is the reason for this, and is it a positive or negative trend?



46 分钟, 331 words。



In contemporary society, there is an increasing number of people that prefer to live alone due to a variety of reasons.



In the first place, household pressure plays a pivotal role in this phenomenon. With the development of economy and society, the demands of people for both materials and spirits are becoming higher and more various than before. For example, in Beijing and Shanghai, the car is not a luxury thing any more, instead it becomes a necessary stuff for modern life. So if someone got married, he or she should try to earn more money to get a car for the family. Also, individuals would have a duty to help their partners to deal with different spiritual problems, such as peer pressure in the workplace, anxiety for the future, worry about interpersonal issues. As a result, they will feel tired of living with another people.



Furthermore, the world view of people has changed significantly at the moment. The requirement for freedom is an important element of the changes, which causes people become fearful of marriage, since they  advocate that they will lose the freedom after the marriage. In addition, living alone is in the best interest of people who hold the opinion that the most important thing in this world is theirselves.



From my point of view, it is doubtless a negative trend for the development of society, as well as the evolution of human itself. Provided that a man does not want to live with another people, he will not have the sense of obligation and motivation to study and work harder. More importantly, this trend will diminish the scale of human gene pool and will also lay a heavy burden on the government after these people become old.



In conclusion, the government should encourage the people to live with other people to curb this negative trend, and take active and practical measures to help individuals cope with the potential problems including economic and mental issues caused by family.



第二篇:

Some people think that using animals for experimentation purpose is cruel, but other people think that it is necessary for the development of science.Discuss both views and give your opinion.



In the long history of development of sciences, it seemed that using animals freely in some experiments was natural and well-accepted by ordinary people. But with the raising of animal protection awareness, this type of experiments has become a controversial issue at present.



Firstly, we have to admit that animal experiment is brutal. Especially in areas of medical research, to develop a new medicine and ensure that it is definitely safe to patients afterwards, researchers have to use lots of animals in process of investigation. More often than not, those animals are afflicted with plenty of pains, which may lead to death after a long period of hard time. Also, the animal vivisection is merciless without any anaesthetic, even though it is an indispensable part of the medical study now. Despite that, animal experiment is necessary for the sciences from the point view of human itself.



The progress in modern technologies such as medical science, space exploration and biology is the result of a host of experiments in 70% of which animals are used.  But in order to relieve the pain of those animals, we should take a series of active and pratical actions. For example, we should make animals in anaesthetic status during the experiment. Besides that, we ought to make sure that the investigation of the experiment is adequate enough and the rate of success is relatively higher.  In the mean time, we can try to find the replacements for those animals, by that, we can diminish the number of animals used in the research substantially.



To sum up, if animals are essential for experiments, we should use them in a more humane way, which also can reflect that not only is our society advanced in technology, but also it is highly civilized.



[]



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沙发
发表于 2010-5-12 13:40:43 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


时间超过了...实际考试中,我大作文只剩35分钟写...


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板凳
发表于 2010-5-12 14:45:31 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


看了一遍,没找出毛病,赞一个~


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地板
发表于 2010-5-12 18:15:40 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


In the first place, household pressure(住房压力?) plays a pivotal role in this phenomenon. With the development of economy and society, the demands of people for both materials and spirits are becoming higher and more various than before. For example, in Beijing and Shanghai, the car is not a luxury thing any more, instead it becomes a necessary stuff for modern life. So if someone got married, he or she should try to earn more money to get a car for the family. Also, individuals would have a duty to help their partners to deal with different spiritual problems, such as peer pressure in the workplace, anxiety for the future, worry about interpersonal issues. As a result, they will feel tired of living with another people.
先不说语法啊,这段楼主想表达什么呀,我完全糊涂了?对物质和精神的要求提高了导致结婚需要买车,需要照顾父母,需要应对更多的压力,所以和别人住一起太辛苦了?难道一个人住就不需要负担了?


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5#
 楼主| 发表于 2010-5-12 23:28:10 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA




household pressure 是: 家庭压力
你说的也有道理, 确实 论证不够有力。
我想表达的是: 一个人住, 就没有人 整天 压着我们 要买车, 将来有了baby, 还要想着往最好的幼儿园送 什么的, 呵呵


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6#
发表于 2010-5-13 09:12:02 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


Furthermore, the world view(世界观是这个词?) of people has changed significantly at the moment. The requirement for freedom is an important element of the changes, which causes people become fearful of marriage, since they  advocate that they will lose the freedom after the marriage. In addition, living alone is in the best interest of people who hold the opinion that the most important thing in this world is theirselves(themselves).


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7#
发表于 2010-5-13 10:29:08 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


雅思作文,我永远的痛


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8#
发表于 2010-5-13 14:18:24 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA




明白了...但是你这样写可能有歧义...也就是说迫于压力而单身,和第三段不结婚其实...重叠了


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9#
 楼主| 发表于 2010-5-13 18:55:50 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA




world view: 世界观 人生观


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10#
发表于 2010-5-13 23:49:19 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


楼主...你用了模板,不过你的英语功底应该不错啊...
加油哦!


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