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[雅思杂谈] 分享学习计划+每天作文练习

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31#
发表于 2010-12-27 20:23:43 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


大家一起加油吧。


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32#
发表于 2010-12-27 21:52:28 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


楼主,以后不要再说是4 6级了,只有在校生才能考吧。
我也要和楼主一起努力。


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33#
 楼主| 发表于 2010-12-27 22:49:49 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


30#的TX,首先很感谢你的建议,你说的很对,我的作文词都是小姨十天里的,背的滚瓜烂熟,自然就用上了,不知道用得对不对,但是按照例句改的,语法一直是我的弱项,没办法,基础不过关。你推荐的帖子我很仔细地看了,是很有道理的,但现在压分紧,要考四个6还是得把目标定高点,我的目标是四个7。其实我是需要平均6,四个6,四个7都可以移民,只不过,475,176,175的关系而已。但是拜读了本论坛的一帖,觉得万一四个6出来了,担保没有了。。。所以还是四个7保靠。我也不是没有自知之明,四个7真的是非常之难,唯有全力以赴尝试着拿下它了。

今天真的是非常糟糕的一天,昨天夜班很忙,一宿没睡,今天早上还要开车把女儿接回家。回到家已经10点多了,查了下分数还没出来,和老婆一起照顾女儿到十二点,想睡一会还有作文等着我写呢,今天其它项目看来是没法子复习了。没想到一觉睡到五点,强迫自己起来写作文,现在刚吃完晚饭,晚上还有一个夜班要上,庆幸的是明天就可以休息了 。前面查了下成绩,overall 5.5 L6.5 R5 W4.5 S5.5 阅读的分数超出我的想象,填差格了还能对一半以上,作文的分数就可惜了,对我来说也是个教训——不到最后绝不轻言放弃,灌篮高手里的至理名言现在是领会得彻底了。口语是我所没想到的,因为我觉得发挥不错,所有题目都答出来了,也没有长时间的硬直时间,纠结啊,难道是传说中的压分?但好像没必要压我这个6吧。最可惜的是总分没到六,那对我来说就是不给后路了。

我不想炫耀自己的辛苦,这个帖子也不是炫耀贴。我以前听到过一句话,怕吃苦吃苦一辈子,不怕吃苦吃苦半辈子。现在的苦是为了将来的甜,我很坚信这句话。以前,当我第一次和一同事很真诚的谈心时才知道移民这回事,我就紧追不舍,无奈实力悬殊要求还一年高过一年,从四个5,到四个6,和将来的四个7。而启蒙我的那个同事在四个5时徘徊了6年多,曾经论坛中的友人已经在澳洲生根发芽,而他很想跟我一起奋斗,但想归想,职业评估也出来了,但至今一次雅思都没考过,听说明年新政策马上就放弃了。对于我来说,他作为一个领路人,我真的为他惋惜,有梦想是不够的,为梦想所付出才是尊重梦想,不然则是空谈,是眼高手低。现在的苦是为将来的甜,我还是那句话,这个世界上值得我们欣赏的有太多太多,但不是现在,而是将来无忧无虑的享受生活!

感谢大家对我的鼓励,真的对我帮助很大,写下自己的肺腑之言与大家共勉!

The fifth essay

Pressure on the school and university students is increasing and students are pushed to hard work when they are very young. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Answer:

Currently, increasing school and university students are suffering large pressure from schooling and upbringing, thus they have to work hard to deal with their school days. Then, whether it is a positive development or not has been a topic of discussion.

"Don't let your children lose at the starting point", that has became a motto that claimed by the most of parents. They think children have to study and study on various areas until they become versatile for the sake of confronting the increasingly fierce competition in the future society. In terms of knowledge, maybe they are right, the strict education could afford the students well-rounded abilities. in particular basic education, the strong basis as a foundation allow students to adjust themselves rapidly to work, learning new skills and so forth. Additionally, indeed, To finish a vast numbers of classes and homeworks are quite painstaking. Whereas, students acquire not only knowledge but also a sense of responsibility and perseverance.

However, on the other hand, stringent education could cause the students to afflict gratuitous pressure at an early age. Childen are, by nature, undeveloped and innocent. Because of that, they have strong curiousity and imagination, whilst excessive pressure could mould them more knowing and their innocence would go extinct, then their strong creativity would be obsolete as well. If that really happen, our future would become a future without imagination. Furthermore, students who experienced too much more strict education, they would find neither attractive nor productive, thus they could never please to continue studying after they graduate.

All in all, students should receive sufficient education but teachers and parents should not excessively clamp down on them and relax them properly.

[]


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34#
发表于 2010-12-28 03:57:47 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


为什么写作分那么低?


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35#
发表于 2010-12-28 15:36:23 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


针对LZ第五篇的最致命错误及建议(for band 6)

1。语法(全文严重问题)2。段内中心不够突出(第二段)。3。模板化-审题不清。

语法:
句号该用则用,该用分号请用分号,逗号不是万能的。比如第三段,洋洋洒洒4行字,竟然只用了3个句号。连词不能代替停顿。
“Childen are, by nature, undeveloped and innocent.” “ they have strong curiousity and imagination”  孩子们没有发展成熟,很无辜,能够称 求知欲和联想吗?他们之间能有因果关系吗?

“our future would become a future without imagination” 不知道想说什么。想说 become hopeless?

"students who experienced too much more strict education, they would find neither attractive nor productive, thus they could never please to continue studying after they graduate."
双主语。 students & they. 还有第三句 thus  以后属于另外一个句子,不要吝啬句号的使用。不要觉得句子越长就越显得有水平。有水平的,用适当的简单句,同样能让文章写出排山倒海的气势。



中心句:
你的第二段中心是“  the strict education in fundamental subjects could help student establish  well-rounded abilities in real life.” 应该放到句首。
还有不要乱用 afford.

审题不清,结构不完整。
题目没有要你提出任何措施建议。你却在最后一段提建议,那是离题,甚至可以认为抄袭模板。
最后一段没有对前面观点进行归纳。那是结构不完整。


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36#
 楼主| 发表于 2010-12-28 21:33:59 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA




有两方面,一个是阅读影响的,考完阅读我都没心思考下去了。二还是因为能力问题,task 2没写完。


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37#
 楼主| 发表于 2010-12-29 05:52:01 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA




很高兴看到3WU老师再度出手 ,分析得很彻底,我是逗句号用不好,还不知道分号怎么用。
不过我的文章基本是用自己自创的模板,因为每天写一篇,基本也就这样的结构了,而且开头我最喜欢用in this day and age,字多啊,虽然currently更好,但就一个字。可是绝对没有抄袭模板,因为我知道,用模板得不了高分。
十分感谢,您的建议我已经设法在下篇文章里改了。


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38#
 楼主| 发表于 2010-12-29 11:20:56 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


The sixth essay

Cheap air travel should be encouraged because it gives ordinary people the freedom to travel further.  However, some people think it leads to environmental problems. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Answer:

In contemporary society, as the rapid progress of traffic technology people can travel by aeroplane more cost-effectively. Subsequently, Some people are delight with that because it is mean that they can reavel further by inexpensive cost, but other people do not think so. Relatively, they are worry about the environment problem which are making by plane.

Evidently, people have benefited from cheap airline tickets. In particular the needy, the inexpensive cost allowed them to tour or visit the places where are far from them. Furthermore, the exotic labours can go home to visit their families and they have choice so that could never be afraid of the costly airline tickets. In terms of businessmen, as they fly a lot, the cheap air travel could greatly reduce the overhead costs of their enterprises. Then, just because of these, increasing people choose low-cost flight. However, maybe that lead a host of positive effects but are accompanyed by some negative effects.

First of all, airline tickets are, essentially, the main source of airways' income. The low-cost price of airline tickets could drive up airline companies' operating costs. For the sake of reducing those, they would choose low-quality fuel for alternative. It is means that a vast deal with poisonous gas would be discharged to the air. Likewise, airline companies would increase the flights for the benefit of boosting profit. This vicious circle could cause not only a sort of threat of the already deteriorative air pollution but also make excessive noise against people who live near the airport.

In Summary, in my opinion, the low-cost of airline tickets should be encouraged. At the meantime, airline companies could make a range of ticket prices and use high-quality fuel for reduce harmful emission.


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39#
发表于 2010-12-29 17:23:30 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


以lz这种努力程度,如果在全英文环境中,有老师帮着改个作文什么的,
1个月就可以全6了吧

楼主帖子的帖子非常给力
我每篇都仔细看了,建议提不出来;也在跟着写, 发觉自己的第一个问题是,想的太过于复杂以致于即使用中文表达我的观点都很吃力。(这句就是个例子)
共勉

And Merry Christmas!


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40#
发表于 2010-12-30 04:45:50 | 只看该作者 来自: INNA


顺便牢骚下那些题目,
像第六篇那样,从前半部分的人道关怀扯到后半部分的环境污染,猛一看实在不知道怎么比较这两者。
考试的时候短时间内理出逻辑,找个自己表达能力范围内的角度入手,确实难度很大。

难怪老外考7分也没那么容易


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