作文累积贴，求批

psikd7r0l5 · 发表于 2012-4-18 22:15:06

得赶啊!!....

帖子我看过,不过没有很仔细的研读, 多谢提醒

psikd7r0l5 · 发表于 2012-4-19 03:00:15

发现按八股的方式一点点写，好困难啊，憋了半天没写完一篇。。。。明天继续～～

psikd7r0l5 · 发表于 2012-4-19 10:59:21

Sports are very popular in today's society. Some people believe, "Winning is the only thing." Others believe, “It’s not whether you win or lose, but how you play the game. “What is your opinion?

It is a diverse field of entertainment which includes a host of elements – singing, dancing, painting, and so on. Sports, the extremely attractive one, have been concerned by people like always, especially athletic competitions. The problem asked and confused by both audiences and contestants recently is, what the most important aspect for whole contest is, process or result? Based on the spirit of athletic sports, I believed strongly that win the victory is the most important pursue in sports field.

First of all, people continuously improve their abilities and skills via pursuit the goal (championship) and struggle with it, which also is the one of the most important aspect to reflect the true meaning of sportsmanship. It is impossible to achieve the goal without keep practices on not only skills, but also willpower. The desire for victory makes you remain keen to continually reinventing ourselves. According to the result of research which held by National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA) shows that the speed of enhance ability individually is far beyond the contestant who eager to win relative to who have not realized it. Therefore, fight for victory is the fount of self-improvement and people are benefited from it at the same time.

Moreover, winning brings us cheerful spirit and reward which both of them are pretty compelling for everybody. It is commonly believed that it would be delightful when people achieve success (be no exception to sports field). More often than not we can feel it from victors or by yourself when you stand on the top of the world which this can be more vividly. Besides, it is universally acknowledged that the prize has become an indispensable part of winning. You may not believe what happened in last game of National Basketball Association (NBA) -- the $2 million first-place prize that was neatly stacked on the table belonged to champion team. Hence, the double joys which winning affords us are seemed to be indisputable.

Given the above argument, it is reasonable to conclude that there are numerous benefits of try to being a winner, not only it can improve our abilities via self-motivation, but also gain the rewards on both joyful spirit and material objects. As a result, winning is everything.

The sports activity is an indispensable part amongst kinds of the world level competitions. Some people argue that the end result is superior to the process; while others do not think so. In terms of the argument, in my stance, both of them are equally important, it means ending and processes are both meaningful in the sports activity.

First of all, good ending encourage and motivate sportsmen be more successful. The reason is good ending can bring honor to contestants. The advantage is obvious -- it can motivate the sportsman strict and discipline, that is to say, they will practice over and over in order to achieve next glories goals. For instance, the champion has staying confident and wants retain the championship, therefore, the huge self-motivation is plays an immeasurable role here. Besides, as some professional athletes could earn prize money according to the gold, silver or bronze medal, so the bonus satisfy their economic needs which also can incentive them to practice harder.

Meanwhile, it is impossible that sportsmen achieve success without the wonderful process. Excellent process, like reassurance, better enhance the confidence of athletes step by step. Actually, the end result would take care of itself if the sportsman fulfills their potential and act the process rightly. On the other hand, although bad process is the barrier of the good ending, it is still useful that analysis the details during process in order to better self-improvement specifically. It is well-known that tennis team of China had failed 5 times during international competitions, but they won the 6th via keep fixed the gaps they had made in last 5 games.

To sum up, it is true that end result is important and significant to sportsman, but the process is also a key factor. Therefore, good ending and wonderful process are located in same position in sports activity.

[]

u0k9h6t8gp · 发表于 2012-4-19 18:24:58

楼上有几点问题，
语法错误，
中式英文，
用词不当，
词序不当，
有套用句子模板的嫌疑

psikd7r0l5 · 发表于 2012-4-19 19:25:54

多谢楼上批阅,看来我要先熟读下老外的文章,找找感觉先

oacc1561 · 发表于 2012-4-19 23:14:05

从句子和用词来看，你文章应该已经看了不少了。现在应该看点语法书，把一些基本的规则和语法知识点弄清楚，可能更对症下药。

psikd7r0l5 · 发表于 2012-4-20 09:20:32

真是对不住帮忙批阅的大虾们，写作我才 4.5 .。。。。。。

不知道如何下手了，难道要从初中语法看起？

psikd7r0l5 · 发表于 2012-4-20 17:46:12

Shopping is becoming a way of entertainment. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Recent year, people spend increasingly money on shopping. Some expenses are used to buy necessities, while in others are just for entertaining. Thus there is a question concerned by individuals, which is whether whole society can be benefited from over-consumption? From my point of view, the answer is yes – that is to say, it is a positive development.

First of all, over-consumption waste money is the most important aspect that a host of consumers are believed. But in fact, this conception is not totally correct. Firstly, it is not wasting that consumers buy something valuable and useful, even though they buy a vast number of commodities back and never use. For instance, purchase antiques. Secondly, we cannot arbitrarily conclude as there are various ways that individuals taking care of their personal goods wisely. Donation is a case in point. Therefore, over-consumption is nothing directly related to wasting.

In addition, it is universally acknowledged that the productivity will have increased by consuming behavior. Obviously, factories would produce more commodities in order to satisfy people’s needs if they had sold out. Meanwhile, mass consumption would encourage economic development as well. On the other hand, workers would lose their jobs as nothing needs produce. It is worth mentioning that the consumer index increased 30 per cent in China last year and she maintained a very high growth rate in terms of GDP, which reported by British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC) two months ago.

To sum up, shopping for entertainment makes great contribute to society, such as, stimulate economic development, although it might be true that it would cause wasting. Therefore, I am strongly believed that increasingly entertaining consumption is a positive development.

[]

疯浪淘金 · 发表于 2012-4-21 02:07:08

同一天雅思的，作文5.5，鼓励下。

psikd7r0l5 · 发表于 2012-4-21 05:16:10

Sports are very popular in today's society. Some people believe, "Winning is the only thing." Others believe, “It’s not whether you win or lose, but how you play the game. “What is your opinion?

The sports activity is an indispensable part amongst kinds of the world level competitions. Some people argue that the end result is superior to the process; while others do not think so. In terms of the argument, in my stance, both of them are equally important, it means ending and processes are both meaningful in the sports activity.

First of all, good ending encourage and motivate sportsmen be more successful. The reason is good ending can bring honor to contestants. The advantage is obvious -- it can motivate the sportsman strict and discipline, that is to say, they will practice over and over in order to achieve next glories goals. For instance, the champion has staying confident and wants retain the championship, therefore, the huge self-motivation is plays an immeasurable role here. Besides, as some professional athletes could earn prize money according to the gold, silver or bronze medal, so the bonus satisfy their economic needs which also can incentive them to practice harder.

Meanwhile, it is impossible that sportsmen achieve success without the wonderful process. Excellent process, like reassurance, better enhance the confidence of athletes step by step. Actually, the end result would take care of itself if the sportsman fulfills their potential and act the process rightly. On the other hand, although bad process is the barrier of the good ending, it is still useful that analysis the details during process in order to better self-improvement specifically. It is well-known that tennis team of China had failed 5 times during international competitions, but they won the 6th via keep fixed the gaps they had made in last 5 games.

To sum up, it is true that end result is important and significant to sportsman, but the process is also a key factor. Therefore, good ending and wonderful process are located in same position in sports activity.

[]

[雅思杂谈] 作文累积贴，求批

个人中心